Taming Some Fears

Wow! Incredible! My daughter and I went hiking to these gorgeous waterfalls on last Saturday night. It was a fun hike. I don't know why, I just don't do enough fun nature stuff with her...I let my sadness for living in this place keep me a little stuck sometimes and also my sadness in not liking who I am right now...until I move right along. So we went hiking. I've been there before. I'm so not too keen on my birth state of Wisconsin. Oh well. I like what I like.

We hiked. They had changed Willow River State Park around a bit, so I had to get my bearings to figure out how to get to the waterfalls again. We hiked down a steep hill. We saw some new things for Bella and a few critters. Never mind that we have a creek right in back of our house, it was great to get out in real nature, right into the woods. Wow again. I absolutely adore nature once I do all the work to get there. I have only to stop making excuses. Then I can get there faster.

I used to do a lot more physical activity. I loved exploring nature, training for events. I feel so good in the middle of a forest or when I remember hiking in Glacier Park and seeing baby bears 10 feet away.

When we approached the waterfalls, there were gobs of people climbing up and down the shallow parts and also across the water. My daughter is part fearless and part careful from me telling her not to run at the pool so she wouldn't fall and get a TBI (traumatic brain injury - yes, I worked for a brain trauma neurosurgeon for 2 years!). She begged for a few minutes and we made our way over for her to get in the water. I thought I would simply take pictures of her. Soon enough, I took my shoes and socks off too. The rocks weren't slippery with the shallow amounts of fast-moving, slightly cold water flowing over them. I climbed up and up again. I was amazed at myself. This allowed me to remember much of the beautiful things I'd done. Jumping off a cliff in Negril. A rock climbing and sea kayaking weekend on the North Shore at age 28. Ah, life.

I love how once you've done something you never lose it. I haven't felt around for the perfect reach and holds for my hands and feet to keep hoisting myself upward for years. It came easily that day.

And then I decided we would make our way across the waterfalls to the other side rather than climb down backwards. I held my daughter's hand and sidled across ever so slowly. I was more the cautious turtle. Fear moved through me. I could feel myself shaking. Even moreso, I felt an invigorating energy. I felt an energy and thoughts inside wondering why I don't just do what it is I want to do.

We made our way to the other side, got our shoes on again and climbed all the way up and then down. That was another feat. It was about a 20 food vertical drop. It wasn't directly straight down, but fairly close. When we finally headed back on the hiking trail, it was becoming dark. It was fun to field her questions about the background noise of frogs croaking. Funny how I rarely am afraid in a situation like that where I am walking back in the near dark but daily life occasionally halts me briefly.

I was so grateful we went that night, and that I didn't let my fears take over. It's time to keep at it and keep at this fun life I'm living and keep creating more of a beautiful life!